Observations I've made about hockey fans on tumblr and IRLPenguins Fans:
OMG PENGUINS SIDNEY CROSBY IS THE BEST PLAYER IN THE WORLD NEALER FLOWER GENO TANGER'S HAIR FUCK THE FLYERS DID I EVER TELL YOU GUYS HOW MUCH I LOVE MY TEAM WHY I AM SCREAMING I COULDN'T EVEN FUCKING TELL YOU
OH YOU'RE A PENGUINS FAN? WELL I HOPE YOU DIE IN A FIRE WHILE YOUR FAMILY IS FORCED TO WATCH AND THEN FORCED TO EAT YOUR REMAINS FUCK CROSBY I HOPE SOMEONE'S SKATE SLICES HIS THROAT CLAUDE GIROUX WAS ON THE COVER OF NHL 13 WHAT NOW
Red Wings Fans:
Oh, you're not a Detroit fan? Well clearly you know nothing about hockey. We've been in the playoffs for 20 consecutive years, clearly we're the best team ever and if you don't agree then you suck and your team sucks. We hate Crosby because he sucks, his stats mean nothing, he's a dirty player. Also, GOTTA REPRESENT THE D.
FUCK BANDWAGON FANS I'VE BEEN A FAN OF THIS TEAM FOREVER, THEY'VE ALWAYS SUCKED ONLY UNTIL RECENTLY YOU PEOPLE KNOW NOTHING FUCK DETROIT WE HAVE HOSSA NOW BITCHHHHH. Also, how can you NOT ship Toews and Kane?
Maple Leafs Fans:
We're just gonna hate on everything because we're Satan.
Our goalie is the living personification of the word sex. That's all we need to say.
Staals staals staals staals rockin everywhere JEFF SKINNER <3
FUCK MONTREAL but Carey Price tho....
FUCK BOSTON but Tuukka Rask tho....
Blue Jackets Fans:
"We don’t play on the same line any more, so that’s not a problem." (on the screaming on the bench)
On nicknames for Kaner: "Well, where do we get started? Lil’ Peekster, lil’ Pipsqueak, yeah I don’t know we’ve got a couple good ones."
Meanwhile, Brad Richards:
In case anyone missed it….dance off from the 2014 Convention
7/19/14: “What was your feeling that seminal moment (when you picked up the Conn Smythe trophy) - what was racing through your head?”